"What a wicked Game to play..."

Deep in those chocolate eyes

I feel holds so many lies

But the shadows that have crept up behind 

whisper it's alright 

 And though he will never be mine

The smile he surfaces suffocates the fear

Unknowingly drys tears 

scars from all the years

Inadvertently causing me to care

Safety in the arms of my predator. 

My new weakness 

My greatest danger..

I dont play games 
when you play with me i rip you to sheds
fuck you 

"You say that you love rain, but you open your umbrella when it rains.
You say that you love the sun, but you find a shadow spot when the sun shines.
You say that you love the wind, but you close your windows when wind blows.
This is why I am afraid, you say that you love me too."- Bob Marley

As the Dust settles

She sits in wait
with the dust to settle
around her aching feet
its time to rest the running was to much
the hiding didn't hide much
even the endless scars.
these splinters stick deep
the running was just too much
Her heart ached,
cause no one felt the quake
time has come to let it down
let it be
let it leave
let go
be free.
But weary mind is yelling inside
do you let go of faith
of hope
as the dust settles..

Haunted Places

It is October 1st and I've been getting into the Halloween spirit for a couple weeks already...ok since august. I work at House Of Horrors and Haunted Catacombs in Cheektawaga, the biggest and best haunted attraction in western NY. I've been working there for six years and it is a strenuous but definitely rewarding job!
 http://www.houseofhorrorsbuffalo.com/ 
Come check us out, we guarantee to scare the hell out of ya =]
Anyways! I LOVE HALLOWEEN! it is my favorite holiday!
So I've been looking at images of old abandon/ haunted houses and there is something so beautiful about decaying places left for dead so to speak. The stories of spirits long gone from the houses and places. There is an odd calmness when walking into a house or through a place like this. I don't know why but I've always been interested in the other side and believe me, there is another side. so these are some images I wanted to share.

I

    I think there is something artistic as well as creepy about these images and the way they were captured. I plan on walking up really early before day break sometime this month and going out to forest lawn cemetery to take pictures before the fog settles. I will be posting those as soon as they are printed. 

I'm not sure what else to do

My mind runs in circles
thinking
about you about us about the future without
It doesn't stop and im starting to feel like its not normal
not healthy
not happy
but everything i try to do just leads back
to thoughts
of you
and its scary to think i wont see you
for years and years on end
till im gone an we meet again.
The stress of it all has torn me up
i feel crazy and its way too much
I'm not sure what to do

Cellar Door

"The depths of our darkest secrets

all the wild nightmares

Lie beyond the cellar door"

Took Mike's lil brother to get his mike tat a couple weeks ago.

Suicide Pevention Day

Today, September 10th is suicide prevention day, we are all suppose to wear purple....
Like somehow purple will stop the bullying, will stop the hate in this world, the war and destruction, the backstabbing and hurting.
We all feel alone at times, like life is just imposable and will never get better. But i have watched a family so dear to me lose an amazing person, myself have a whole piece of my heart missing too, he took all of us with him. There isn't a day that goes by we don't think of him and are reminded of his voice, his laugh, to feel his presence. Like many others, he did not realize what all the love he truly had. I have other friends who have lost their sister, friends and even a father by suicide. There is an immense struggle to not long for that person and shed tears for them everyday. And despite suicide being publicized now and bullying coming out in the media, people still think its ok to say and do hurtful things to one another.
After our friend/ brother/ son/ sister/ has died there are days I know we all think, well i have thought: maybe the had the right idea, this world is ending, there is war, death, and incredibly rude inconsiderate people everywhere i turn and i sometimes think, maybe thats why he left. Maybe he couldn't stand watching everyone treat everyone else like garbage.
After his death, i felt that i should have been there for him when he needed me most. to this day I play that day over in my head and think if i tried harder i could have saved us all this incredible pain. I think everyone of us feels this same way. if we had tried if we were nicer. what if, could have should have. And although i know it is no use thinking of it haunts us everyday.
Some people say suicide is selfish and sinful....we don't know fully and understand fully the reasons for some to take their lives, when you have a mental illness, sometimes, you truly believe its the only way to stop the pain inside, to quiet the voices that continue to taunt you day in and day out. I feel if people were more understanding instead of walking away because they don't want to deal with the person they think is simply "crazy" depression and suicide wouldn't be happening this much.
When I talked to my friend i felt like he understood me more then anyone i had ever met, i felt most comfortable laying by his side, i haven't felt that in a long time. i had trust in this man. When he left i felt that i should have left with him, that i left him alone, that he really thought i didnt care. But not only this, we both could not find love here, we were both searching aimlessly and because we were hurt so much before we couldn't see what was right in front of us. I tried once to leave and woke up.
And so after years, i started to look for others, soemone i could feel safe with someone who would treat me right, even just a trust worthy friend. but there are so many people who are very selfish that when you gift your heart one day, its a backhand the next. I felt as though i was running in circles, when i wanted to care and be cared about i was pushed away and forgotten. but you sometimes realize that people are just inconsiderate, they will never see the pain they cause others and it's not your fault. When people treat you badly it says nothing about you but it says so much about them.
 Death is something i think of quite a lot. some times i really believe im at a dead end. that i will never be content in this world but only when I'm gone and find him again.
I have been broken, mistreated, used and torn apart by people i believed cared for me, even just a little bit. Just like the rest of us have at some point in life, just because someone did it to you doesnt mean you have to become hardened by hate also or feel the only way is out. But in the end part of me is glad i never succeeded, i would never want my true friends to feel the way i feel everyday, to feel this pain and hurt of what i could have done to save the only guy that truly cared for me and his friends, i just believe in the fact that he could not take the hate we put on each other anymore. I have tried my hardest to be the best person i can and some have hurt me badly for being too nice but i also look at the ones who do care and do appreciate me, how they would be devastated if i made this choice, this is what keeps me going. a simple call from a friend. a night with my friends, seeing my family. forget the ones who don't deserve your love, love yourself and move on. Holding on to the past and people that make you this sad is not worth it.

"Do not make a permanent solution to a temporary problem."

I miss you Michael and one day when it is my time, i will make this up to you, and we will find love where we couldn't find it here. if you had stayed maybe things would be different but I dont blame you and i am not mad at you anymore, i have accepted your decision i know why you had to do this.  you have also become an example to live by, for the ones who hurt you to be more careful with their words an actions, for the ones who are thinking of a way out, to see the broken hearts you left behind.
1987-2009

Recently found Mikey Artwork =]

So i did a post about Mike SS and his artwork, I was looking for this drawing and one of our good friends had it. I love this, its mikey at his best. I miss you so much my darling <3

The Darwin Martin House

I really enjoyed our last excursion to the Darwin Martin house, it was gorgeous and I may come back and take the two hour tour when the house is closer to being finished. The architecture was very planned out and Frank Loyd Wright put a lot of thought in exactly how he wanted his structure.

 With all the hidden things and the way he liked to make people feel uncomfortable in a space, to move or sit somewhere, it reminded me a bit of Rose Red. Rose Red was loosely based off a mansion called the Winchester House in which the wife continued to build the house to confuse the ghosts she believed were haunting her.
The Winchester Mansion contains 160 rooms and cost more the $5,500,000. There are miles of twisting hallways, with secret passage ways, staircases and doorways that lead to nowhere. A lot of it was designed by Sara Winchester herself. It was said that she asked helped with her design of the house with nightly seances and for protection from "bad" spirits. There was never any blue prints to the house and there also wasn't a building inspector.
"Mrs. Winchester’s elegant Grand Ballroom is built almost entirely without nails. It cost over $9,000 to complete at a time when an entire house could be built for less than $1,000! The silver chandelier is from Germany, and the walls and parquet floor are made of six hardwoods – mahogany, teak, maple, rosewood, oak, and white ash."
http://www.winchestermysteryhouse.com/thehouse.cfm

 Rose Red on the other hand, was a mansion that was remodeled to be a hotel, actually named Thornewood Castle, when author Stephen King wanted to use it for his movie, he modeled it to its original structure. In the book, Ellen Rimbaur and her life at Rose Red, she had married a rich man from an oil company and the house was his gift to her. The story goes that the house had been build in the early 20th century, on an old indian burial ground, which Ellen was not aware of upon purchasing the property. Mr. Rimbaur intended to cover up this fact and burned the bones of the Indians, aggravating the spirits. Many people got lost in the house, men would turn up dead and women missing. As had Mrs. Winchester, Mrs. Rimbaur continued to build her house for the spirits. She had hallways that led to nowhere and hallways that got smaller, with hidden doors for the rooms. I believe even though this house is fiction, it still poses a certain art.

Western New York Book Arts Center

I enjoyed the excursion we went on a couple weeks ago to the printing press place called the Western New York Book Arts Center. I bought a print from there of a cupcake and a little buffalo post card. Not only did they have a workshop for printing but they had room to exhibit other artists pieces. I knew Buffalo was an artistic city but after this class I am really beginning to notice just how much this city does for art.
I also enjoyed the video we watched about Amos Kennedy and how he made printing a career. In the Book Arts Center, they explained how patient one has to be to make prints. I never realized how much work really goes into it. I enjoy looking at Amos's posters because they are different from any art I've ever seen.
Amos Kennedy makes posters with very opinionated thoughts that sometimes make people uncomfortable but I like the slogans he adds. These are probably my favorite ones I have seen of his work so far.

The Fire Chicken

I finally finished the oil painting I started 4 semesters ago, of my very good friend Michael. With a little help from Mr.Porter, I think it turned out pretty good. This is Mikey driving in Cali (though the picture was in Depew) in his Fire Bird, that he called the Fire Chicken.:)
<3

Collection #12 Salvador Dali

I know Salvador Dali is very well known and probably defeats the purpose but I like the surrealism of his paintings and wanted to look him up. He was born in 1904 and died in 1989 living as a Spanish painter, graphic artist and designer.
I chose a couple painting I like of his the most to talk about.
I really like butterflies and some of his paintings have butterflies with a surrealist approach which I find very inspiring. I couldn't find the name of this first painting but I love how the flower's leaves are the wings of a butterfly. There are also little people walking around the flower, there's a lot that can be interpreted in this painting.

Salvador Dali is best known for his paintings of the melting clocks. I like these because time to me is such a mystery and there is never enough of it. Time can heal and hurt, time is not infinite and one day time will catch up to us all. Time is scary.

Collection #11 Jasmine Becket-Griffith

Jasmine is a full time artist who lives with her husband who works for her in shipping out her pieces. She paints, makes sculptures and t-shirts. She paints all the time, she is now 30 and has been painting since 1997. She has many different galleries from fairies and gothic to alice in wonderland.

The first is in the fairy collection and can be bought in many sizes and are all acrylic.
"The Three Fates - in Greek Mythology known as The Moirae - of destiny  - as a universe of galaxies swirls behind them.  Clotho is on the viewer's left - a portrait of innocence in angel wings as she spins the thread of life on her spinning wheel.  Lachesis is in the center, measuring the length of the thread of life between her careful hands.  Atropos glares out from the viewer's right hand side - with her "abhorred shears" - scissors snipping the thread of life with a final cut."
I chose this one because it has a good story behind it. I'm very into mythical things and spirituality of things that cannot be seen. 

 "Darling Dragonling 2"
I like this one because it's Halloween like but also has a cute quality.

I chose this next one because it's bright and cute =] 
"Snow Bunny"

I love this next one because she put Alice in a salvador Dali painting. 
"Alice in a Dali Dream"

"Winged Seer"

Collection #10 Mark Ryden

Today in my drawing class this one girl I talk to told me about this artist after we were talking about Tim Burton and his art. She suggested I look up this artist and I have to say I do love his stuff, more morbid art. :)
Currently working in Los Angeles, Ryden has paintings exhibited in museums around the world, including a retrospective "Wondertoonel" at the Frye Museum of Art in Seattle and Pasadena Museum of California Art.
http://www.markryden.com/index.html

To me his artwork renders a type of fantasy and morbid nightmarish quality, with some political and religious views makes one think about the meaning behind it all. There seems to be a lot of meaning behind what he paints and is trying to portray in his works.

This work is called "Incarnation" and was also the inspiration for the meat dress worn by lady Gaga at the MTV music awards.

 This piece is entitled "Christina" in the collection "the meat show" and I chose this just because I love Christina Ricci. This collection, also involving the one above this, involves slabs of meat in random places which could have a political view of how meat is used, but I'm not sure. I guess every piece of art is open to interpenetration.

For instance, in the next couple paintings, Ryden portrays things like the devil holding meat and the girl in the photo is holding a cross. It may be the struggle between good and evil with innocence of the young. He uses alot about pop culture and the dark side of things.
"Slayer" Oil on panel 13x15

This painting has a little girl going into a butcher shop and she is holding the hand of Abraham Lincoln, who shows up in a lot of Ryden's paintings.
"The Butcher Bunny" Oil on panel  16x16 1999

 I like this next painting because it's more peaceful and my kind of scene.
"Just the girls" 21x21 1998

Morbid stuff is my thing, so I found one of his collections called "Blood" The painting seem like they were set back in older times with a type of elegance about them. The detail is amazing and with such simplicity shows a certain story of hurt maybe with the subjects.
I like this painting because the little girl seems to be at great peace as she stands bleeding to death, her eyes are closed tight but she shows no pain.
"Fountain" 12x6.25 oil on panel 2003 

Here's another one with Lincolns head in it, not sure why the significances but it's pretty morbid how it's sitting on this little girls bed. We also disgust in class that the frames can also be part of an art piece, I think this is true with his paintings also.
"Lincolns head" 4.5x6.5 oil on panel.

 I just think this painting is cute, there isn't anything creepy about it per say and Christmas is always a magical time. I like the way he captures the snow and the sky.

"Santa Worm" 14x10 oil on panel 2000

I like paintings that show a type of religious view because I'm not particularly religious and theres a lot of different things one could say about "God" and the way life should be lived. I do believe in a higher power, a life after death but I also think religion has been twisted so many ways that people have lost the sense of simply being a good person.
"Piano Player" framed 29x39x3inches 2010

  

Collection #9 Greg "Craola" Simkins

Let me just start off saying that I am a BIG fan of Blink 182, probably my favorite band I grew up with, I think all their albums are great. I have their page on my facebook and they posted about their friend's next showing to be taken place at Merry Karnowsky Gallery in Los Angeles, CA.

This is the website to the gallery he is showing his work :
http://mkgallery.com/index.php

I chose to write about this artist because his work is of the morbid side, which I love but also because there is a lot of detail in all his pieces. I believe he did some work for Blink but I'm not exactly sure what. The collection he did for the Merry Karnowsky Gallery was written about in the American Art Collector Magazine: 
http://www.americanartcollector.com/
Doing a little snooping, I found his Facebook page :

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Greg-Craola-Simkins/126782594001871?__adt=3&__att=iframe
Which then led me to his website :
http://www.imscared.com/
Simkins started drawing when he was as young as three years old with crayons and pencils which turned into using pen and other ink forms, and is now into acrylic paints. Movies which bring about the outside world is mostly where his inspiration comes from, the "falling down the rabbit hole" effect of imaginative and alternative realities. His art incorporates these worlds and different aspects of nature which until he has painted it so, could never interact with each other. He describes how certain land animals would never be able to live alongside the ecosystem of the sea and brings them together in his work. By the age of 18 he began creating graffiti art under the name "craola" which gave him the opportunity to experiment with large spaces for canvases. He then moved on to working at Treyarch/ Activision and did work on Tony Hawk 2X, spiderman 2 and ultimate Spiderman.

After looking through the extensive gallery on Simkins page, I am blown away, utterly inspired because i havnt done much painting lately, and he is now my new favorite artist!

This is the first painting that really caught my eye, yet after that they just kept getting better. I love the originality of his work and the morbid type of quality, theres so much in one painting if you look close enough there are a lot of different creatures. It's beautiful, how they're sitting on a cloud yet they're head stones in it. He did do some work for AFI and this painting reminds me of some of their albums.
"Elil and Fu Inle"-36x30 in Acrylic canvas. 2011

Everyone knows South Park and how Kenny dies in every episode, here's a rendition of Kenny being an angel. I love the detail and shading in this one, in all of them.
"Kenny Angel"-18x12 in- Acrylic on canvas, 2011

The last painting I want to show, I love because they way he painted the pumpkins just give it a morbid but beautiful quality. I really love Halloween and you can see closely different symbols he was trying to make like how the crayon says "escape", in other words that he is implying how art is an escape.
"Join Me"-20x30in Acrylic on canvas, 2011

On his website he has an abundance of drawings, paintings and graffiti work that he has done, I left his website at the top so you should definitely check him out. Simkins has generated a lot of fan bass and many of his fans have went as far as getting his art tattooed on them.
This one is pretty sweet, it kinda looks like a more morbid Blink bunny coming out of this guys chest.

Looking at his work, makes me have better ideas for what I want tatted on my back. hmmm this is a thought now.

Had to add this one! Rendition of Edward Scissor Hands!